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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25443193">Questions of Love and Life</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/OfMonstersAndWerewolves/pseuds/OfMonstersAndWerewolves'>OfMonstersAndWerewolves</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Once Upon a Time (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aromantic, Asexual Character, F/F, Lesbian Character, Other, Queerplatonic Relationships, Questioning, aroace lesbian, but Merida is very much questioning whether she wants to be in one, even if she might not use those exact labels for it, they're not in a qpr yet</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 08:00:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>489</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25443193</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/OfMonstersAndWerewolves/pseuds/OfMonstersAndWerewolves</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Merida wants to spend the rest of her life with Mulan by her side. But she doesn't think her feelings are romantic, and she isn't quite sure what the love of her life would think to that.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Merida &amp; Mulan (Once Upon a Time), Merida/Mulan (Once Upon a Time)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Questions of Love and Life</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So this was a quick idea I had and wrote down. I've headcanoned the animated Merida as being aroace for some time, but got more of a sapphic vibe from the OUAT version of her. So this was me trying to reconcile both headcanons by making her an aroace lesbian, though whether she'd personally use those specific labels is another matter.</p><p>Whilst I am a wlw ace myself, I'm not specifically an aroace lesbian, but hopefully I've managed to do the idea justice. Best bet for anyone unfamiliar is not to assume that every oriented/aligned aroace views their identity or attraction in the same way Merida does here.</p><p>This is actually my first foray into uploading a OUAT fic not related to Curious Archer. I also haven't seen Season 5 in ages.</p><p>Hope you enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Merida wasn’t entirely sure when she first realised. </p><p>It wasn’t a single event or occurrence that did it. Rather, it was a slow build up of moments here and there, a culmination of each glance or touch or conversation.</p><p>Mulan.</p><p>There was something about her that set Merida's heart alight. When spending time with her felt like the sun would never set, as though every bad thing evaporated in her presence, it was no surprise she embraced every opportunity she had of doing so.</p><p>It was clear now. Merida wanted to wake up to her, and while away the hours with her by her side.</p><p>She wanted to live and laugh.</p><p>She wanted to talk and share her thoughts and emotions, and tell her every worry and want, and comfort her back when needed.</p><p>She wanted to go off on quest after noble quest, trudging upon well-trodden grounds or sludging through the next peat bog on whatever journey they partook in, fighting back against anybody foolish enough to dare stop them.</p><p>To spend the rest of her life with Mulan would be a dream come true.</p><p>But not in that way.</p><p>No.</p><p>Not in that way. Not like that.</p><p>But like what? That’s how you were supposed to love someone, wasn’t it? </p><p>But it wasn’t the same thing. It wasn't.</p><p>There were many regional terms for the love of women. Visitors from Storybrooke told tales of ‘lesbians’ and ‘sapphics’, and DunBroch very much had its own language for that kind of thing, words and feelings that were still much preferred over those originating or more commonly spoken in other lands.</p><p>And each one seemed to fit her.</p><p>They fit the way she preferred the company of women. How she loved the way they smiled and laughed and cried and fought. How their humanity shone through; all the life and loss and anger and joy; all the frustration and excitement and pain and mischief.</p><p>But she didn’t want to date. Or marry. Or kiss. Not in that context at least. Not with the implications of romance. Not really.</p><p>Nor did she have any want or desire to… connect in certain manners. A certain physical manner. A certain emotional manner. She craved intimacy, but one that took a very different form.</p><p>She'd heard Mulan herself talk about her love for women; her romances and the one night stands. And it didn't quite seem to be the same thing. </p><p>She had no idea how Mulan would react to this. Maybe she’d think her crazy? Or maybe she’d want to try something?</p><p>She might not understand fully what she felt, but perhaps she’d still be open to something?</p><p>Surely it was worth a shot?</p><p>“Merida? You ready to go?”</p><p>The sudden question shocked her out of her thoughts, as her head turned towards the inn doorframe, Mulan leaning against its wooden structure. </p><p>“Oh, yeah of course. I’ll be with you in a minute.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading!</p><p>There's an interesting discussion to be had as to whether people in the Enchanted Forest and the like would use the labels we use to describe ourselves in The Land Without Magic. It's one that often springs to mind when our own languages are so entwined with the history of our world, though of course that could apply to every single word we use and create and I'm fully aware I'm overthinking this but whatever XD. It's certainly an interesting conundrum when writing fantasy worlds nevertheless, particularly one with such sparse worldbuilding as OUAT.</p><p>I don't have any plans as of right now for any more fics of this ilk, but I'm definitely open to writing queerplatonic BraveWarrior if any more ideas spring to mind.</p><p>Stay safe everyone!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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